Wednesday, December 29, 2021

MidMonth Mirth Memo, December 2021

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

DECEMBER 2021

 


 

Question of the Month:
Do memory foam mattresses wish they could forget?

Warning of the Month:
Stop killing buffalo for their wings.
 
Observation of the Month:
Before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.

 
                                                


Photo of the Month:

Shopping done. Gifts wrapped.

 



Story of the Month:

I was in the six-item express aisle at the supermarket. Completely ignoring the sign, a woman snuck ahead of me with a shopping cart piled high with groceries. I was quietly fuming but that changed when the cashier beckoned the woman to come forward. She looked into the woman's overloaded cart, then asked: "Which six items would you like to buy?

                                                
 
Artist of the Month:

Helga Stentzel turns everyday items into fun characters.
 

 
                                               

Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?
 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the Free MIRTH MEMO
 

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MY HOLIDAY GIFT TO YOU

My publisher, Mango Publishing, is offering a 20% discount on all my books they publish.
SUCH A DEAL!

Select from
The AWE Factor
The Joy of Simplicity
Embracing Life After Loss
The Lighten Up Book
Positive Thoughts for Troubling Times


Get 'em All Here
https://mango.bz/books/searchresults?q=Allen+Klein


Copyright © 2021 Allen Klein, All rights reserved.
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Monday, November 15, 2021

MIdMonth Mirth Memo, November 2021

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

 

NOVEMBER 2021

Wishes of the Month:

- Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say, "Close enough."



"I-Wish-I-Was-Somewhere-Else"
Observation of the Month:


The longest drum solo was 11 hours and 17 minutes. It was performed by a child sitting behind me on flight #987, from Seattle to Tokyo.



Foto of the Month:

Why should you have to call to make an appointment? Shouldn't a psychic know when you will show up?
 


Advice of the Month:
By replacing your potato chips with grapefruit as a snack you can lose up to 90% of what little joy you still have left in your life.




Thought of the Month:

                                                

Funny Facebook Posting of the Month:

https://www.facebook.com/846897267/posts/10158268138797268/?d=n
 
                                                

Fun Art of the Month:

https://mymodernmet.com/household-surrealism-helga-stentzel/?

                                                

Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?
 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the Free MIRTH MEMO
 

https://tinyurl.com/yb9939v7
                                                

HOLIDAY GIFT GIVING

Give the gift that keeps on giving. All of Allen's books are available on Amazon, at other online booksellers, and can be ordered from you local bookstore.

SUGGESTED TITLES
The AWE Factor
Positive Thoughts for Troubling Times
The Joy of Simplicity
You Can't Ruin My Day
The Healing Power of Humor


Copyright © 2021 Allen Klein, All rights reserved.
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Friday, October 15, 2021

MidMonth Mirth Memo, October 2021

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

 

OCTOBER 2021

Made Up Words of the Month:

Chiptease

This is when your chip bag contains more air than chips.
 

Errorist

This is someone who is repeatedly wrong. 
 

Internest

This is when you create a nest of blankets for yourself while browsing the internet. 


Funny Foto of the Month:
The photo below was show to a grade school class. The children were asked to suggest a headline.
The winning entry:
NEVER SWALLOW YOUR CHEWING GUM


 


Advice of the Month:
The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap.
Stay safe, eat cake.



Groaner of the Month:

                                                

Magic Matches of the Month:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2chQKSGowjg

                                                

Lighten-Up Read of the Month:

Laughter and Longevity  
 
https://www.aath.org/post/laughter-and-longevity
 
                                                
 
Article of the Month:
 
The Princess and the Pastry

https://allenklein.blogspot.com/2021/09/the-princess-and-pastry.html


                                                

Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?
 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the Free MIRTH MEMO
 

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Copyright © 2021 Allen Klein, All rights reserved.
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Friday, September 24, 2021

SOMETIMES "NO" IS A BLESSING

  

Sometimes the world says “no” when we wanted a “yes.” And sometimes, you realize later that “no” was the better answer.

It all started when I made reservations at a restaurant for my husband, Dave, and I. Because of Covid and knowing that the weather in Berkeley might be sunnier than potentially foggier San Francisco, I asked for outdoor seating. An hour before we were to be seated, I received a call from the restaurant. The hostess told me that although I had requested outdoor seating, it was full. However, she would seat us right next to the open window.

I wasn’t a happy camper and tried to convince her otherwise, but it didn’t work. When we arrived at the restaurant, I inquired again about eating on the patio, but, as she had informed us earlier, we were seated indoors.

It was right next to a very large open window. I sat on the bench that ran along the wall next to it. Dave sat opposite me.

That morning I had some intestinal issues, but I was feeling fine now and enjoyed my light Japanese lunch while sipping some genmaicha tea. After lunch I went to the bathroom and returned to our table. All was fine, until very suddenly it wasn’t.

I broke out in a cold sweat as the room started to spin. “I think I’m going to pass out,” I blurted to Dave who was seated opposite me. Next thing I know, without me being conscious of it, he is beside me wiping my head with a cold wet towel. I must have blacked out again because what I remember after that was five paramedics helping me lie down while they attached various medical devices to my arm.

In the emergency room, I was feeling better as all sorts of tests were being performed. The results didn’t show any reason to keep me in the hospital, so I was released.

Once home, I thought about the eventful day, I was grateful for the hostess’s “no” to my request to be seated outside. Had we done so, there was a very good chance that when I collapsed, I would have fallen off the chair onto the cement pavement. Instead, when I blacked out, the small section of wall supporting the window, prevented me from falling to the floor. In addition, I was already seated on a bench when the paramedics asked me to lay down. There would have been none outside.

I am fine now and recovering nicely. The incident has also taught me a great lesson. We may not like hearing the “nos” in our life but sometimes they can be our lifesavers.

—Allen Klein is the author of The AWE Factor

                                                                                                               -Allen Klein ©2021 















Wednesday, September 15, 2021

MidMonth Mirth Memo: September, 2021

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

 

SEPTEMBER 2021

Question of the Month:
Have you ever listened to someone for a minute and thought, "Their cornbread isn't done in the middle."


Things to Think about this Month:
-I got kicked out of the hospital. Apparently the sign "stroke patients" meant something completely different than I thought.
-"In the 1970s, I broke my leg after falling from my bike. I'm telling you now because there wasn't any social media then."
-"My train of thought just derailed. There were no survivors."


Photo of the Month:

 

Technology of the Month:
There's a new app that shows what you will look like when you're older. It's called a mirror. Try to uninstall.

 
                                                

Fun Thing to do this Month:

Draw an iceberg.    

 
 
                                                
 
Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?
 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the Free MIRTH MEMO
 

https://tinyurl.com/yb9939v7
                                                
 
 
Video Podcast of the Month:
 
An Intimate Interview
with Allen Klein


https://youtu.be/8FE9QuaLdQw


 
                                                

Article of the Month:
 
"Have an Awesome Autumn"
from the Mindfulness Journal

 

Sunday, August 15, 2021

MidMonth Mirth Memo, August 2021

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

 

AUGUST 2021

Covid Comedy of the Month:
"If you believe all this will end and we will get to normal once we reopen everything...raise your hand. Now slap yourself with it." 

www.bizwaremagic.com
 

Having some states lock down and some states not lock down is like having a peeing section in a swimming pool.  

https://politicalpunchline.com


Day 13 of social distancing: Struck up a conversation with a spider today. Seems nice. He's a web designer.
 

www.bizwaremagic.com

Mask of the Month:
 

Artist: Tatsuya Tanaka


Things to Think about This Month:
"Don't be worried about your smartphone or TV spying on you. Your vacuum cleaner has been collecting dirt on you for years."

"You come from dust, you will return to dust. So, stop dusting. It could be someone you know." 

"Laughter is the best medicine. Or wine. It might be wine."


Photo of the Month:

IRON WOMAN COMPETITION 

 
                                                

Mirthful Magic of the Month:  
 
                                                
 
Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?
 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the Free MIRTH MEMO
 

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Video of the Month:
 
MAKE TIME FOR MERRIMENT
 
 

Copyright © 2021 Allen Klein, All rights reserved.
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Thursday, July 15, 2021

Mid-Month Mirth Memo, July 2021

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

 

JULY 2021

Fone-Fun of the Month:
—"Yes, I still have a landline. I use it as a cell phone finder." 


—People are excited about the new iPhone but no one has embraced the technology of using a blinker when you drive.

—"Hard to believe...but I once had a phone that was attached to the wall. And every time it rang, I'd pick it up without even knowing who called."


I-Don't-Get-It Sign of the Month:

 

Cartoon of the Month:

Waiter asking a couple dining at a restaurant:
"Is everything O.K.? I haven't seen you photograph your food yet?"




Advice of the Month:

"Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are."            

—Will Ferrell, comedian
                                                

Happy Wedding Dance of the Month: 
 
 
                                                
 
Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?
 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the Free MIRTH MEMO:  
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AWE & WONDER Video of the Month:
 



 
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