Sunday, January 15, 2023

MidMonth Mirth Memo, January 2023

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

JANUARY 2023

 

First Joke of the Month:

I have some good news and some bad news. Which do you want to hear first?

Can you do both at the same time?
 
Sure. Grandpa stopped snoring.



Advice of the Month:


Airplane Announcement of the Month:
  

Captain: "The weather ahead is good. We should have a smooth and uneventful flight. So sit back and relax....OH, MY GOD!"

 
Silence followed, and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said,“Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier." 
 
"While I was talking to you, the flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!" 


A passenger in coach yelled out,“That's nothing. You should see the back of mine!”



Second Joke of the Month:
 
 








"


















Man: When is your birthday?

Woman: March 1st.

 
Man walks back and forth a few seconds.

Man: O.K., now tell me when's your birthday.


Mistake of the Month:

 


Third Joke of the Month:

Back in the day, excessive use of commas was considered a serious crime.
 
It usually resulted in a long sentence.



Bargain of the Month:
 
 
  _______________________________


Song of the Month:

"Are You Having Any Fun?"
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=68gnYCznvYs
 
  _______________________________
 
 
Meeting of the Month
 
Sometimes the beginning of the year is a sad time when we think about those who are no longer with us. Beginning Wednesday, January 18th, a dozen speakers will be part of a FREE summit to help you ease your loss.
 
Sign up here:
My session will be based on my book, 
Embracing Life After Loss.
It will show you how to go from loss to laughter.
 

 
  _______________________________

Still Available...Until the End of the Month

My publisher, Mango, is offering a whopping 30% discount on all my books they publish. Offer good until the end of January. 

https://mango.bz/books/allen-klein-240-a

Grab a copy for yourself
or as a gift for someone else.



 

  _______________________________
 
                
Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?

 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the
Free MIRTH MEMO

 

https://tinyurl.com/yb9939v7

  _______________________________
 
 
 




 


 


 
 
                         
 

 


                          
 


 

                             
   

 
 


 
 


 
Copyright © 2023 Allen Klein, All rights reserved.
Email Marketing Powered by Mailchimp

Tuesday, November 15, 2022

MidMonth Mirth Memo, November 2022

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

NOVEMBER 2022
 

Food Suggestion of the Month:

 
                         
 

Predicament of the Month:
I can't pickup my dog's prescription because I don't know her date of birth. The pharmacist won't tell me because of patient privacy. And she won't tell me because she is a dog.

 
Funny Face of the Month:
 

                          
 

Questions of the Month:
-Why do people point to their wrist when they want to know what time it is, but don't point to their behinds when they want to know where the bathroom is?

-Why do people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every couple of hours?   

-Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?


Advice of the Month:

 
                             
                         

Groaner for the Month:
 
Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one photo, because when you've seen Juan you've seen Amal. 


 
Misspelled Sign of the Month:
 

                            

Lesson of the Month: 

Barbie didn't give me a poor body image. Barbie taught me that you can't reattach a head once it's removed from a body.
 
  _______________________________

Fun Fotos of the Month:
 

 
  _______________________________
 

Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?

 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the
Free MIRTH MEMO

 

https://tinyurl.com/yb9939v7

  _______________________________

In honor of November's 
National Hospice and Palliative Care Month



Book of the Month


EMBRACING LIFE AFTER LOSS:

A Gentle Guide for Growing Through Grief  

 
When my wife died at the age of 34, I was devastated. I sought a therapist who told me that life was tough. I already knew that; I fired him. I read grief books to ease my loss. The authors told me about all the bad things I might experience—lack of appetite, loss of sleep, feeling depressed. I stopped reading.

What I needed was a book that inspired me, that lifted me up, that comforted me and was easy to read. Not finding that, I wrote my own. That book, Learning to Laugh When You Feel Like Crying, is now available here:

 
https://www.amazon.com/Embracing-Life-After-Loss-Growing/dp/1642500062/?_


 
 

One Reader’s Comment
"Allen's book resonated deeply in me. Not only did it help on an emotional level, but there were many practical, real life, suggestions. It's the kind of book that you can pick up and read one page, or many, and find healing benefits. A good book to keep on a coffee table or nightstand for many years after the grief journey begins…. Thanks Allen for contributing to the healing of many."




 
Copyright © 2022 Allen Klein, All rights reserved.
Email Marketing Powered by Mailchimp

Saturday, October 15, 2022

MidMonth Mirth Memo, October 2022

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

OCTOBER 2022

 

List of the Month: 

The three hardest things to say:
1- I was wrong.
2- I need help.
3- Worcestershire Sauce



Fashion Inspiration of the Month:

                         
 

Post of the Month:
Someone posted that they had just baked some synonym buns.
I replied, you mean just like the ones grammar used to make?
Now I'm blocked. 

 

Bathroom Signs of the Month:

                          
 

Questions of the Month:
-If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
-Why do people say "heads up" when you should duck?
-What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread?


Road Signs of the Month:

                             
                         
 
  
Groaner for the Month:
 
The walk from my house to the bar is 5 minutes. The walk from the bar to my house is 35 minutes. The difference is staggering.


 
Funny Face of the Month:

                            


Advice of the Month: 

Confuse your doctor. Put on rubber gloves at the same time he/she does.
 
  _______________________________

Machine of the Month:

The Lunch Feeder
 

 
  _______________________________
 

Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?

 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the
Free MIRTH MEMO

 

https://tinyurl.com/yb9939v7

  _______________________________

Books of the Month: 


LIMITED TIME OFFER 

200 Therapeutic-Related Humor & Laughter Books  

 
 
As the author of the best-selling book,
The Healing Power of Humor, I have been collecting books related to the subject for over thirty-five years.

I'm now divesting of them. 
If you are interested in seeing the list, email 
humor@allenklein.com

Many books are autographed,
some out-of-print,
a few are vintage.
Most are at a very low price.



P.S.: The research category has items not available anywhere else.



 
Copyright © 2022 Allen Klein, All rights reserved.
Email Marketing Powered by Mailchimp

Thursday, September 15, 2022

MidMonth Mirth Memo, September 2022

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

SEPTEMBER 2022

 

Groans of the Month:
As I suspected, someone has been adding soil to my garden.
The plot thickens

I used to work as a soft drink can crusher.
It was soda pressing.

How do you keep a person in suspense?
I'll tell you tomorrow.


Sign #1 of the Month:

 
 

Advice of the Month:

"Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night."
 
—Dave Barry

Sign #2 of the Month:


 
 
 
 
Thought for the Month:
 
I hate it when people try to act intelligent and talk about Mozart when they have never seen one of his paintings.



Sign #3 of the Month:



Exercise of the Month: 
 
Think of a number between 1 and 10.

Add 22 to it.

Multiply the sum by 2, and then subtract 1.

Now close your eyes. It's dark, isn't it?



Handymen of the Month:
 

  _______________________________
 
Silly Trick of the Month:

Go to Google.com and type "Flip a coin" into the search engine. Then hit enter.

You'll see an animation of a coin flipping in the air. 

See if you get heads or tails, or, clip "Flip again" to try your luck a second time.
 
  _______________________________

Awesome Art of the Month:
 


 
  _______________________________
 

Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?

 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the
Free MIRTH MEMO

 

https://tinyurl.com/yb9939v7

  _______________________________

Book of the Month: 


THE ART OF LIVING JOYFULLY

How to be Happier Every Day of the Year

by
Allen Klein 
Foreword by S.A.R.K. 

 
A joyful compendium of uplifting quips and quotes

to keep for yourself or give as a refreshing gift. 





Sample Quotations

 
Every day, tell at least one person something

you like, admire, or appreciate about them.

-Richard Carlson


The trouble with nude dancing is that

not everything stops when the music stops.

-Sir Robert Helpmann


I'm tired of all the nonsense about beauty being
only skin-deep.

That's deep enough. What do you want—an adorable pancreas?

-Jean Kerr



Get It Here

https://www.allenklein.com/joyfully.htm

or

https://www.amazon.com/Art-Living-Joyfully-Happier-Every/dp/1936740192/ref=sr_1_1?
 
Copyright © 2022 Allen Klein, All rights reserved.
Email Marketing Powered by Mailchimp

Monday, August 15, 2022

MidMonth Mirth Memo, August 2022

 

 
"Prepare for mirth,

for mirth becomes a feast."


-William Shakespeare


 

The Mid-Month Mirth Memo is a short amusing tidbit to brighten middle of the month monotony. It is brought to you by best-selling author, award-winning speaker, 

"Jollytologist" ® Allen Klein         

www.allenklein.com

AUGUST 2022

 

Thought of the Month:
If liar's pants really did catch on fire, watching the news would be a lot more fun.

Nostalgia of the Month:

 

Witticism of the Month:

"In real life, I assure you. There is no such thing as algebra."
 
—Fran Lebowitz
 
Things to Think about This Month:
 
Just before you die...

Swallow a bag of popcorn kernels.

Your cremation will be epic.



After your funeral...

Have one of your friends use your cellphone to text everyone,

"Thanks for coming."


 


Artwork of the Month:
 
 
 

Groaner of the Month: 
 
CINDY: "Did you hear about the guy who fell onto the airport baggage carousel?"

MINDY: "No. Did he get knocked out?"

CINDY: "Yes, but he came around slowly."

-AARP Bulletin, May 2022
 
 
  _______________________________
 
Fun Watch of the Month:
 
 
  _______________________________

Awesome Art of the Month:
 
Chalk It Up

 
  _______________________________
 

Wanna get the MidMonth Mirth Memo every month?
 
SUBSCRIBE yourself or a friend to the
Free MIRTH MEMO

 

https://tinyurl.com/yb9939v7

  _______________________________

Book of the Month: 


CHANGE YOUR LIFE!

A Little Book of Big Ideas 
 

Excerpts:

Can you imagine experiencing the world as a great sandbox given for us to play in like we did as children?

-Judith-Annette Milburn


We live in an ironic society where even play is turned into work. But the highest existence is not work; the highest level of existence is play.

-Conrad Hyers


If my heart can become pure and simple like that of a child, I think there probably can be no greater happiness than this.

-Kitaro Nishida





Get It Here:

https://www.amazon.com/Change-Your-Life-Little-Ideas/dp/1573444073/ref=sr_1_2?


 
Copyright © 2022 Allen Klein, All rights reserved.
Email Marketing Powered by Mailchimp